Chain Mails

* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place & sometimes. I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample & try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number & then I get a phone bill from with calls to Uganda, Singapore & Tokyo.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and
urine.

* When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl, no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me then take my kidneys & leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times. (Poor girl! she's been 7 since 1993..)

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft & AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their sp! ecial e-mail program would arrive soon.

* My free Nokia phone never arrived & neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.

* Still open to help some from Bulgaria who wants to use my account to transfer his uncle property of some hundred millions $.

* Made some Hundred wishes before forwarding those Ganesh Vandana, Tirupathi Balaji pics etc... now most of those 'Wishes' are already married (to someone else)

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